How to Propose a Toast

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As a kid, did you ever have that uncle, grandfather, or the eccentric relative that you had no idea how you were related to them, give amazing toasts? Toasting is an art and, like your kiss, you will be remembered for this. Toasts can be to love, friendship, health, wealth, or happiness.
  1. They need not be long. Something as brief as "To Dave, a great friend and an amazing musician," will suffice.
  2. When toasting you rise, lift your glass and look the person you are toasting in the eyes. Make the toast and take a sip all while keeping eye contact. To break eye contact is disrespectful. You need not rise when there are only two of you.
  3. Add a reminiscence, praise, relevant story or joke to appear more poised and eloquent.
  4. The toast should always be in keeping with the occasion.
  5. At a dinner party a host or hostess offers the first toast. A guest may propose a toast to the host if a toast is not offered by the host. A guest may also propose a second toast after the host.
  6. At less formal dinners anyone may propose a toast as soon as the wine or champagne is served.
  7. A small sip allows one to drink numerous toasts from the same serving. It's tacky to get drunk at a dinner.
  8. If you don't drink alcohol participate in the toast by raising your empty glass or whatever beverage you are consuming. Not to do so and remain seated would be extremely discourteous.
  9. If you are being toasted you remain seated and do not drink the toast. After the toast you rise and drink to your toasters.
  10. The practice of toasting in different languages has grown quite popular. Here are seven that all mean, "To your health."
French - A votre santé
Spanish - Salud
German - Prosit
Swedish - Sköal
Yiddish - L'Chayim
Polish - Nazdrowie
Italian - Salute

I propose a toast to you, my reader and friend:

May you
have warm words
on a cold evening,
A full moon
on a dark night,
And the road
downhill
all the way to your door.