mom & dad on one of their first dates.
Do- go for a midweek lunch - short and sweet. Why drag out a painful date over dinner? You'll know by the time lunch is over if you want to go out again. I never understood going to a movie or a concert on a first date. How are you supposed to get to know the person? If I can be frank, women get a little stressed at the end of the dinner date. Kiss, hug, hand shake, coffee upstairs, sex? Seriously, make it a few lunch dates first - coffee upstairs at a later date won't be so uncomfortable.
- offer to meet your date at their place of work or pick them up at home. Most of the time they'll say they'll just meet you at the location but offer anyway.
- have a place in mind ahead of time. If you're going on a lunch date stay clear of the pizza by the slice place and the fancy schmancy place with three forks. Choose something with good lighting (and that doesn't mean bright), excellent service, a quiet atmosphere and a good wine list. Keep in mind that your date may be veg so try and pick a place with a few more vegetarian selections on the menu.
- keep an eye on the time (but not obviously). If your date has to be back to work respect this. If you control your own lunch break set a conclusion time in your head. You want to look responsible.
- people love talking about themselves. Use the five Ws - who, what, when, where, why and how for good measure. Travel, hometowns, food, movies, and music are all safe topics.
- a little flattery never hurts.
Don't
- talk about your ex, sex, money, work, death or disease.
- go to a place where you may run into an ex or one that brings back memories of an ex.
- get drunk on a date.
- be a jerk to the waiter.
- expect your date to pay. If you did the inviting, you pay. Just because you paid doesn't mean you get a little. A friend of mine actually came across this; 'I paid for dinner. You owe me.' I went and picked her up and he, in his fur loin cloth and club, went back to his cave. Yet another reason we subconsciously get stressed over the dinner date.
- say you're going to call when you're not. If you want to go out again ask if you can call later in the week.
6 comments:
I doubt (or rather, hope!) the word was never used in the same context outside of Melbourne but people used to say 'grouse' as in 'awesome' - 'grouse mountain chair lift, mate!' ;)
I haven't heard that one before - even in my days living in the Australian village of Whistler British Columbia (there are a lot of Aussies there). I wonder if Grouse is therefore a popular mountain with Aussies? BTW the mountain's not that 'bitchin'
Great and to the point tips, I like this simple format.
Unfortunately, I feel like the date, at least in my age group, is completely passe. People prefer using non-verbal communication aka social media and texting to convey their interest. If only real dating came back in fashion....
Really?!
As much as I have panic attacks over dates I feel somewhat saddened by this news.
What about the cheeseballs and their pick up lines? Do these no longer exist?
This non-verbal communication of interest reminds me of bathroom graffiti I used to read at the Starfish Room. Could bathroom stall graffiti possibly be one of the first forms of social networking? After all, by going to the same club we're in the same 'social network'. 'Hey Paul, I got your info from a stall at the Starfish. It said I was to call you for a (insert noun here).'
Alas, I'd be forever dateless as I don't have a cell phone and have never texted in my life. Passenger pigeons on the other hand...
I like the idea of going on lunch dates first. I agree movies and concerts make absolutely NO sense! But I always ended up dating friends, even my current mister and I were really close friends for a year before we started dating... and our first date was kayaking!
Oh, I also agree that when in a long-term relationship, sometimes you pine for those first dates, the simple gestures that show the budding of affection...
Great post :)
Hi Rae,
I hope you had a good Valentine's Day!
I only dated one friend - but we were only friends for about six months before but there was that chemistry ya know...it only lasted about two years.
I met my husband a year later - after I styled his band - ha ha! Our first date was 'Hannibal' and Japanese food - ten years ago today.
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